Our sense of body image is always important, but now more than ever, it is important that we approach ourselves with kindness, compassion, and love.
This is a difficult time for everyone, and in times of stress, it can be hard to stay optimistic and body-positive. The coronavirus pandemic has caused a major shift in routine for many people. This impacts everyone differently. The social isolation that can result from quaratining has been shown to trigger or worsen mental health related issues. Moreover, many people are experiencing changes in their bodies from staying home and eating differently. With so much change and so much that seems out of our control, it is so important that we practice self-kindness and compassion.
Practicing self compassion means being kind to yourself. It means having positive internal dialogue, speaking to yourself like you would to a close friend. People tend to be their own worst critics, which can reinforce harmful thought patterns and lead to insecurity.
I'd like to share my own personal experience with cultivating self-compassion.
When I was in middle school and high school, my self esteem was at an all time low. I wasn't satisfied with the way I looked, nor with the way I performed in school or in my social life. I was sad and anxious most of the time, and I had a tendency to withdraw from my family and friends.
At this point in my life, my inner dialogue (the voice in my head) was toxic.
I was mean to myself. Whenever I made a mistake, that inner voice told me that I was stupid, a failure, and that I would never be successful. Not only did these thoughts hurt me in the moment, but also trapped me in a cycle that only furthered my insecuiry. For example, I would make a mistake, my inner voice would berate me, my self confidence would drop, I'd make another mistake, and the cycle would repeat itself. By the end of my first year of high school, I was mentally drained.
During the summer between my freshman year of high school and my sophomore year, I had a paradigm shift. After reading articles upon articles about improving ones mental health, I realized that one of my major problems was that I allowed my inner voice to bully me. It was an ingrained habit for me to be pessimistic about my circumstances and to be mean to myself, even though, ironically, I would never treat another person with such cruelty.
It definitely hasn't been easy to break out of that habit. I don't think I fully broke out of it until my junior year in high school. It took a lot of self-awareness, patience, and forgiveness. But, eventually I realized that it was only logical for me to be kind to myself. In a world where the people around me can be gone in an instant, I am always guarenteed to be stuck with me, so I might as well make that a good experience. Also, nobody knows yourself in the way that you know yourself. No other person can fully understand what's going on in your head as well as you can (and don't let anyone tell you otherwise). So, in a sense, nobody can love you in the same way that you can love you.
Self-compassion and self-care have gradually improved my mental health and helped me to deal with difficult situations. For example, when I notice that I'm feeling sad, I carve some time out of my day to practice self-care, whether that be journaling, meditating, or even just taking a nap or doing something I love. I've noticed over time that this change in thinking has led me to respond to "failure" or difficult life circumstances in a much more optimistic and constructive manner.
This is why self-compassion is so important to me. During this time and in the future, I challenge you to think about the way that you treat yourself. Are you taking care of yourself? Are you kind to yourself? How do you feel?
Thank you for reading, and I truly hope that you and your loved ones are staying safe, healthy, and happy during these uncertain times.
- Anjali Temal